Dumb and Dumber...

Kourtney Kardashian and her new BFF Kendra Wilkinson are talking about breastfeeding in the new issue of US WEEKLY. You can feel it coming can't ya...

Kendra says: "I was so scared that I wasn't going to be able to nurse that when I saw stuff come out of my nipples the other day, I was like, I can breast-feed? And I asked my doctor, who said, 'That's fine, but it's not milk yet!'"

Kourtney added: "They say usually you can breast-feed with implants. I want to."

Upon hearing this bit of wisdom, both of their fetuses jumped out of their bodies, ran to Pennsylvania and jumped into Kate Gosselin's womb, because at least there they felt safe.

Classy Photo from Kendra Wilkinson's Wedding

Former Playboy bunny Kendra Wilkinson was the first of Hugh Hefner's 3 girlfriends to find true love outside of the mansion.
While no official photos of the wedding have been released, paparazzi managed to snag a few photos from hovering helicopters.
more HERE

Kendra is Preggers

Former Playboy plaything, Kendra Wilkinson and her fiancé, NFL star Hank Baskett are going to become parents, she has confirmed.
more HERE

Could this get any creepier?

Kendra Wilkinson is engaged!
Anyway, Hef tells UsWeekly that Kendra is promised to be married to Philadelphia Eagles wide receiver Hank Baskett, "Kendra Wilkinson has met someone who she would like to spend the rest of her life with. He popped the question last Saturday. I have given her my blessing and will be giving her away at a very special wedding ceremony at the Playboy Mansion this coming June."

Trading Tarts for Twins

82-year-old Hugh Hefner has confirmed to E!'s Marc Malkin that his fairytale romance with Holly Madison has ended its run.
Hef said, "If she says it's over, it's over. But like I've said before, she is the love of my life, and I expected to spend the rest of my life with her."
The Playboy papaw said the relationship started to go downhill six months ago after they found out he isn't able to father another child. He said, "With my sperm count, it's not possible. I was willing but it was not possible…She'd like to be married and have children, but it's not in the cards here for me."
Where does that leave the other two Girls Next Door, Kendra Wilkinson and Bridget Marquardt? Hef said that his relationship with Kendra will be ending when she moves out of the house by the end of the year.
Not to fret though since there are new options in the mansion. Hef has moved in 19-year-old twins Kristina and Karissa Shannon (above). He said, "They very much want to be girlfriends and now under the present circumstance, they probably will become my girlfriends."

A 'Girl Next Door' and her Fiancé

While no one was surprised to hear that Kendra Wilkinson isn’t a 'real' girlfriend of Bunny Magnate Hugh Hefner, it was greeted with general surprise that she was dating the 6′4″, 220 lb. Philadelphia Eagles wide receiver Hank Baskett and that hints were being dropped about it on her MySpace pages.
more HERE

We already knew "E!" has given Kendra a reality show of her own as well...

Playmate Kendra scores her own reality show?

The most unlikeable Girls Next Door may be moving out and moving on after the E! reality show’s fifth — and likely last — season.
“Kendra Wilkinson has been offered her own reality show about starting her life over again when she moves out of the Playboy Mansion,” an insider said. “Hugh Hefner knows her time is coming.”
more HERE

We are assuming this will be filmed in a dumpster somewhere near San Diego, California. We can only hope her very white trash mother, Patty Wilkinson, appears in every episode. If they get one of those huge trash dumpsters they could actually live together...The theme song should be that laugh of hers...

oh...for the record...Olive Garden hates Kendra...

Holly and Bridget Hate Kendra

"Holly and Bridget hate her," a friend of Kendra Wilkinson told Page Six. "They're totally jealous. She has her own empire now. She's got a clothing line, a modeling career and an exercise empire. They're just sitting there hangin' with Hef."
"Kendra was never really Hef's girlfriend. She was cast for the show [E!'s 'The Girls Next Door'] because Bridget and Holly are old, and they needed a young hot girl for Hef. She was selected from a bunch of Playmate wannabes."
Holly Madison is 28, Bridget Marquardt, 34. Wilkinson celebrated her 21st birthday last year.
Wilkinson is said to be eyeing her exit from the show and the famed mansion next season. "She's definitely out," her friend said. "There are too many rules and Holly and Bridget want her gone. They're so mean to her." Plus, she' has had a hard time sticking to the rules of the Playboy mansion - which include a curfew and a strict "no dating other men" line.
"She goes out all the time really late and parties," her pal says. "She's definitely been linked with other guys . . . She likes rappers and sports guys."

The Ballad of Hef & Holly

Hugh Hefner doesn't want to marry Holly Madison.
The Ultimate Playboy - who lives in THE PLAYBOY mansion with Holly and his two other girlfriends Kendra Wilkinson and Bridget Marquardt - has no plans to tie the knot again after going through two divorces.
He said: "I love Holly very much and I think we're going to be together the rest of my life. But marriage isn't part of my puzzle. It's not a personal thing - I just haven't had much luck with marriages."
Holly, 28, is still keen on the idea of marriage, but accepts it is unlikely to happen.
She said: "We are no closer to getting married than we were years ago. It's like a car stalled at the side of the road."
Meanwhile, Hugh has revealed he has no intention of giving up work, despite being 82-years-old.
He said: "I have no plans to retire. It's the perfect combination of work and play that keeps you young. If I quit work it would be the beginning of the end for me."
more HERE

The Girl Next Door...to the Mustang Ranch...

Hefner whore Kendra Wilkinson appearing on "Celebrity Rap Star", Vanilla Ice should take a page from her....