Tuesday, February 28, 2006

Stripper or Super Model?

Most people would be happy to look like Molly Sims.

But the supermodel is said to be less than thrilled with this eye-popping picture from the latest Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue.

"Molly is trying to be known for her acting now, and frankly that picture makes her look like a stripper," says an insider.

"She phoned up her agent at Next Models and screamed at her when she saw the shot."

A Sports Illustrated rep denied that Sims pulled out of the launch party because she was unhappy with the image. "We knew well in advance that Molly was not going to be at the party," he said, adding: "Molly did not have approval rights over the picture."

For the record, the agent in question says the suggestion she was screamed at is "absolutely not true."

Monday, February 27, 2006

Prego Barbie: New for 2006

Electric Middle Finger for Quadriplegics

What the world needs now is a Remote Controlled Middle Finger!

It normally sits on your desk as a closed hand. When a co-worker says something moronic, you secretly activate the remote control, and it flips them off.

What they need now is a adapter kit for wheelchairs so that quadriplegics can flip people off too.

$27.89 from Prank Place

Our Friend the Camel Spider...

Seems the troops in Iraq have been running into these not so small creatures in the desert, Do you really need weapons of mass destruction where you have armys of giant spiders roaming the country?

It reminds me of a Sam Kinison discussion that ended with "WE HAVE DESERTS IN OUR COUNTRY TOO, WE DON'T LIVE IN THEM OR GROW THINGS IN THEM"

We should let them have their SANDBOX, they have lived in it for thousands of years and they seem to like it when they are not BLOWING IT UP....

Check out the video HERE.

The Science of Cow-tipping

Katrina vs. Minimum Wage

Proclamation by the President: To Suspend Subchapter IV of Chapter 31 of Title 40, United States Code, Within a Limited Geographic Area in Response to the National Emergency Caused by Hurricane Katrina

A Proclamation by the President of the United States of America

1. Section 3142(a) of title 40, United States Code, provides that “every contract in excess of $2,000, to which the Federal Government or the District of Columbia is a party, for construction, alteration, or repair which requires or involves the employment of mechanics or laborers shall contain a provision stating the minimum wages to be paid various classes or laborers and mechanics.”

(b) The wage rates imposed by section 3142 of title 40, United States Code, increase the cost to the Federal Government of providing Federal assistance to these areas.

Helping the poor by repealing minimum wage.

Nine Inch Nails DOWNLOAD

Nine Inch Nails
The Toledo Sports Arena,
Toledo, Ohio - 2/21/06
Download the entire show HERE .

Sunday, February 26, 2006

The Sunday Film Festival and Freakshow

Finally A Use for Those AOL CD's

Saturday, February 25, 2006

Don Knotts, TV's Lovable Nerd, Dies at 81


Don Knotts, who kept generations of TV audiences laughing as bumbling Deputy Barney Fife on "The Andy Griffith Show" and would-be swinger landlord Ralph Furley on "Three's Company," has died. He was 81.

Knotts died Friday night of pulmonary and respiratory complications at a Los Angeles hospital, said Paul Ward, a spokesman for the cable network TV Land, which airs his two signature shows.

Griffith, who remained close friends with Knotts, said he had a brilliant comedic mind and wrote some of the show's best scenes.

"Don was a small man ... but everything else about him was large: his mind, his expressions," Griffith told The Associated Press on Saturday. "Don was special. There's nobody like him.

"I loved him very much," Griffith added. "We had a long and wonderful life together."

Unspecified health problems had forced Knotts to cancel an appearance in his native Morgantown in August.

The West Virginia-born actor's half-century career included seven TV series and more than 25 films, but it was the Griffith show that brought him TV immortality and five Emmys.

The show ran from 1960-68, and was in the top 10 of the Nielsen ratings each season, including a No. 1 ranking its final year. It is one of only three series in TV history to bow out at the top: The others are "I Love Lucy" and "Seinfeld." The 249 episodes have appeared frequently in reruns and have spawned a large, active network of fan clubs.

As the bug-eyed deputy to Griffith, Knotts carried in his shirt pocket the one bullet he was allowed after shooting himself in the foot. The constant fumbling, a recurring sight gag, was typical of his self-deprecating humor.

Knotts, whose shy, soft-spoken manner was unlike his high-strung characters, once said he was most proud of the Fife character and doesn't mind being remembered that way.

His favorite episodes, he said, were "The Pickle Story," where Aunt Bea makes pickles no one can eat, and "Barney and the Choir," where no one can stop him from singing.

"I can't sing. It makes me sad that I can't sing or dance well enough to be in a musical, but I'm just not talented in that way," he lamented. "It's one of my weaknesses."

Knotts appeared on several other television shows. In 1979, he replaced Norman Fell on "Three's Company," also starring John Ritter, Suzanne Somers and Joyce DeWitt.

Early in his TV career, he was one of the original cast members of "The Steve Allen Show," the comedy-variety show that ran from 1956-61. He was one of a group of memorable comics backing Allen that included Louis Nye, Tom Poston and Bill "Jose Jimenez" Dana.

Knotts' G-rated films were family fun, not box-office blockbusters. In most, he ends up the hero and gets the girl - a girl who can see through his nervousness to the heart of gold.

In the part-animated 1964 film "The Incredible Mr. Limpet," Knotts played a meek clerk who turns into a fish after he is rejected by the Navy.

When it was announced in 1998 that Jim Carrey would star in a "Limpet" remake, Knotts responded: "I'm just flattered that someone of Carrey's caliber is remaking something I did. Now, if someone else did Barney Fife, THAT would be different."

In the 1967 film "The Reluctant Astronaut," co-starring Leslie Nielsen, Knotts' father enrolls his wimpy son - operator of a Kiddieland rocket ride - in NASA's space program. Knotts poses as a famous astronaut to the joy of his parents and hometown but is eventually exposed for what he really is, a janitor so terrified of heights he refuses to ride an airplane.

In the 1969 film "The Love God?," he was a geeky bird-watcher who is duped into becoming publisher of a naughty men's magazine and then becomes a national sex symbol. Eventually, he comes to his senses, leaves the big city and marries the sweet girl next door.

He was among an army of comedians from Buster Keaton to Jonathan Winters to liven up the 1963 megacomedy "It's A Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World." Other films include "The Ghost and Mr. Chicken" (1966); "The Shakiest Gun in the West" (1968); and a few Disney films such as "The Apple Dumpling Gang" (1974); "Gus" (1976); and "Herbie Goes to Monte Carlo" (1977).

In 1998, he had a key role in the back-to-the-past movie "Pleasantville," playing a folksy television repairman whose supercharged remote control sends a teen boy and his sister into a TV sitcom past.

Knotts began his show biz career even before he graduated from high school, performing as a ventriloquist at local clubs and churches. He majored in speech at West Virginia University, then took off for the big city.

"I went to New York cold. On a $100 bill. Bummed a ride," he recalled in a visit to his hometown of Morgantown, where city officials renamed a street for him in 1998.

Within six months, Knotts had taken a job on a radio Western called "Bobby Benson and the B-Bar-B Riders," playing a wisecracking, know-it-all handyman. He stayed with it for five years, then came his series TV debut on "The Steve Allen Show."

He married Kay Metz in 1948, the year he graduated from college. The couple had two children before divorcing in 1969. Knotts later married, then divorced Lara Lee Szuchna.

In recent years, he said he had no plans to retire, traveling with theater productions and appearing in print and TV ads for Kodiak pressure treated wood.

The world laughed at Knotts, but it also laughed with him.

He treasured his comedic roles and could point to only one role that wasn't funny, a brief stint on the daytime drama "Search for Tomorrow."

"That's the only serious thing I've done. I don't miss that," Knotts said.

Kid Rock/Scott Sapp Sex Tape


View it HERE.

Announcements Taken from Church Bulletins

The following comments were found in church bulletins. It makes us wonder if someone had a few nips of sacramental wine!

Thursday night - Potluck supper. Prayer and medication to follow.

Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and community.

For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

The rosebud on the altar this morning is to announce the birth of David Alan Belzer, the sin of Rev. and Mrs. Julius Belzer.

This afternooon there will be a meeting in the South and North ends of the church. Children will be baptized at both ends.

Tuesday at 4:00 PM there will be an ice cream social. All ladies giving milk will please come early.

Wednesday, the ladies Liturgy Society will meet. Mrs. Jones will sing, "Put me in My Little Bed" accompanied by the Pastor.

Thursday at 5:00 P.M. there will be a meeting of the Little Mothers Club. All wishing to become little mothers, please see the minister in his study.

This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Lewis to come forward and lay an egg on the altar.

The service will close with "Little Drops of Water." One of the ladies will start quietly and the rest of the congregation will join in.

Next Sunday a special collection will be taken to defray the cost of the new carpet. All those wishing to do something on the new carpet will come forward and do so.

The ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind and they may be seen in the church basement Friday.

A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow.

At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What is Hell?" Come early and listen to our choir practice.

Next Sunday Mrs. Vinson will be soloist for the morning service. The pastor will then speak on "It's a Terrible Experience."

Due to the Rector's illness, Wednesday's healing services will be discontinued until further notice.

Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM. Please use large double door at the side entrance.

Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and community.

The eighth graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the church basement on Friday at 7 PM. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.

A song fest was hell at the Methodist church Wednesday.

Today's Sermon: "How Much Can a Man Drink?" with hymns from a full choir.

On a church bulletin during the minister's illness: "God is good - Dr. Hargreaves is better."

Potluck supper: prayer and medication to follow.

The outreach committee has enlisted 25 visitors to make calls on people who are not afflicted with any church.

Eight new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.

The choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning to join the choir.

FEB SWEEPS: OPRAH IN GRAPHIC SEX TALK



Oprah interviewed a woman on Thursday who had engaged in sex with more than 90 men during her life and who was keeping an ongoing list and a video diary about these encounters!

Not to be confused with Howard Stern, Oprah asked: "So you've had men ejaculate in your face?"

The February Sweeps sex special from the nation's top talkshow host, titled "Guests discuss their sex addictions," raised eyebrows with industry watchers.

"You've had, you know, men ejaculating in your face who you don't even know who they are," asked daytime Winfrey.

WINFREY: OK. So tell me, what's going on when you're actually having the sex?...Coming up, Jennifer just admitted that she's had sex with almost 90 men.

JENNIFER: I had a one night stand last night in this room. And now I'm obsessing about it. I was at a cafe, and there was a guy there that I just decided that I wanted to have. Kind of like you walk into a bakery shop and you see an eclair, and that's the one you want. You know, I just went up to him and introduced myself and started chatting with him, gave him my number, basically all the while thinking, `I need to have sex with this person.' And it doesn't matter who he is or what he is, that's the one that I want to want me. And he slept over and I had sex with him and I had unprotected sex with him.

(Excerpt from videotape)

(Graphic on screen)

Jennifer, 25 Sex Addict Video Diary

JENNIFER: There's, like, a few reasons I feel like I have unprotected sex. One, I--it's so much about the guy feeling pleasure and pleasing him and I want it to be good for him. And the other one is I just don't care...

WINFREY: Eighty-nine guys, unprotected sex....

MORE

AMY (Says She Has Had Sex With More Than 70 Men): It's not about sex with me. It's about the intimacy or being close to someone or feeling needed. Even though I'm totally out of control, I still feel that I am in control for that moment. I'm trying to think about men that I've slept with, and I honestly can't remember, just 70 to 75, probably somewhere around there. Currently, I probably have four or five different guys I could call if I wanted to. I am tired of being alone. I don't want to be this way. I want to feel good enough within myself to not feel like I need to do this. I want to change. I want things to be better.

(End of excerpt)

WINFREY: So you told our producers you're disgusted with yourself. Yeah.

Musically Speaking: I Was There...in the day...

Richard Pryor
Anthology


October 1981
The Circle Star Theatre
San Carlos, California







Frank Dean and Sammy
Together Again
Opening Night
Oakland Coliseum
Oakland, California
3/13/88







Elvis
Cow Palace
SF CA
11/28/76




KISS
Destroyer




Cow Palace
SF CA.
with Cheap Trick
8/16/77



Led Zeppelin
Physical Graffitti


Last US Show
7/24/77
Oakland Coliseum
Oakland, California





Edgar Winter
They Only Come Out at Night


8/4/76
Johnny and Edgar Together Tour
Las Vegas Convention Center
Las Vegas NV





Foghat Greatest Hits

4/15/78
Cow Palace
SF CA




Pink Floyd
Animals

5/10/77
Oakland Coliseum
Oakland, California

A Classic Triple Bill

THE PUNCH LINE

"Do you think it's a good idea, letting an Arab country take over our ports? This is like letting Bill Clinton be the manager of a Hooters." -- Jay Leno

Army Charges Seven With Having Sex on Video

The Army has recommended that seven 82nd Airborne Division paratroopers be discharged following allegations they engaged in sex acts shown on a gay pornographic Web site.

Three soldiers face courts-martial on charges of sodomy, pandering and engaging in sex acts for money. Four others received nonjudicial punishments, according to a statement released by the military Friday.

The charges do not mention the name of the site, but the division had previously been investigating allegations that soldiers appeared on a gay pornography Web site. A spokesman for the division said the charges were a result of that investigation.

The military-themed Web site did not make any direct reference to the division or Fort Bragg, a sprawling post about 70 miles south of Raleigh.

"As far as we're concerned, it's isolated to the unit, and our investigation determined that these seven individuals were the only ones" involved, said 82nd Airborne spokesman Maj. Thomas Earnhardt.

The charges indicate the soldiers' behavior is "a much more serious matter than just their sexual orientation," said Steve Ralls, a spokesman for Servicemembers Legal Defense Netowrk, a legal group that helps gays and lesbians in the military.

"I'm not going to make excuses for service members who are taking part in sexual conduct for money," said Ralls. "It would be absolutely criminal regardless of whether they were heterosexual or gay."

Earnhardt said the three soldiers charged under military law had been appointed military attorneys, but he said the lawyers would be unavailable for comment on Friday.

Seven soldiers in all have been charged, three are facing more serious charges.

The three soldiers who face courts-martial are: Spc. Richard T. Ashley, Pfc. Wesley K. Mitten and Pvt. Kagen B. Mullen. The Army did not release their ages or hometowns, but said all seven paratroopers were members of the 2nd Battalion of the 508th Parachute Infantry Regiment.

An arraignment was scheduled for March 7.

The other four soldiers who received nonjudicial penalties were not identified. Their punishments included reduction to the rank of private, 45 days of restriction to the unit area, 45 days of extra duty and forfeiture of a month's pay.

The registered owner of the Web site's domain name lists an address in Fayetteville, the city that adjoins Fort Bragg. A phone number listed for the registered owner was not in service Friday, and e-mails to the owner have been regularly returned as undeliverable.

The 15,000 paratroopers of the 82nd Airborne are among the Army's most elite soldiers, having volunteered to serve in a unit that trains to deploy anywhere in the world within 18 hours.

The military's "don't ask, don't tell" policy states that "homosexual orientation alone is not a bar to service, but homosexual conduct is incompatible with military service." Service members who violate the policy are removed from the military.

Is it Cold in Here?

The Sex Pistols on the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Induction Costs

Resuscitation of a Dead Dog

This video clip purportedly show the resuscitation of a dead dog, as conducted in the 1940 by Dr. S.S. Bryukhonenko at the Institute of Experimental Physiology and Therapy in the former USSR.

Mind you, it’s a propaganda video from an era designed to make the Russians look good (regardless of scientific merit - some Stalin-era scientists even outright faked data to make them look good / avoid the gulags).

Link: "Experiments in the Revival of Organisms" (via WFMU Beware of the Blog - worth a read)

Before you dismiss it out of hand, however, see also this Pittsburgh Tribune article on how scientists at the Safar Center for Resuscitation Research revived dogs 3 hours after clinical death (no brain activity).

Safar, who died two years ago, proposed flushing the circulatory system with an ice-cold salt solution, which would drop the core body temperature to about 50 degrees compared to the usual 98.6 degrees.

Cooling the body in this way would buy extra time to transport injured soldiers or trauma victims in cardiac arrest to the hospital, Safar reasoned. The cold temperature would have a preserving effect so no damage would occur to tissues and organs, even though the heart would be stopped.

BTW, the Safar Center is named after Dr. Peter Safar, the inventor of CPR.

Chair/Stove/Chair/Stove

The DoubleSpace kitchenette caters to those with a taste for unique, compact living. People living in crowded cities such as New York can appreciate the value of flexible, efficiently used living space. This roomy easy chair converts easily into a countertop with two electric burners.


SMALL IS THE NEW BIG reports the New York Times. The average American home rose to over 2,300 in 2001, from 1,500 square feet in 1970. Across the Pacific, Japanese families live in homes that average only 1,000 square feet, according to Azby Brown, author of The Very Small Home: Japanese Ideas for Living Well in Limited Space

It's so true that Vestal designers overlapped the two functions to create a new kind of convertible. (Safety features include not being able to turn on the burner while the DoubleSpace is in the chair orientation.) A carefully placed axle allows the perfect sitting height to swing upward to become the perfect cooking height. Such designs can make it easier for people to take up less space, as well as use less energy and raw materials.
Check it out HERE.

Friday, February 24, 2006

Leader of the Free World

Clark’s Liquid Breathing Mouse.



Dr. Leland Clark, inventor of the platinum "Clark electrodes" used to detect oxygen in liquid (and allows measurement of blood oxygen levels) also did this famous experiment in "liquid breathing":

Dr. Leland Clark of Cincinnati invented a blood substitute allowing this living mouse to breathe in the liquid, while goldfish inhabit the water floating on top.

After bubbling oxygen through the fluorocarbon, the oxygenated fluid was pumped into the animals’ lungs, and recirculated (about 6 cycles of inhalation and exhalation per minute). Most of the animals who were kept in the fluid for up to an hour survived for several weeks after their removal, before eventually succumbing to pulmonary damage.

More can be read HERE.

Thursday, February 23, 2006

Food Choices...

You can say alot of things about this place, but there is no disputing the BUFFALO WINGS ARE AMAZING...

To find one near you click HERE

The Bible : A Short Course

AMEN: The only part of a prayer that everyone knows.

BULLETIN: 1. Parish information read only during the homily. 2. Catholic air conditioning. 3. Your receipt for attending Mass.

CHOIR: A group of people whose singing allows the rest of the Congregation to lip-sync.

HOLY WATER: A liquid whose chemical formula is H2OLY.

HYMN: A song of praise, usually sung in a key three octaves higher than that of the congregation's range.

RECESSIONAL HYMN: The last song at Mass, often sung a little more quietly, since most of the people have already left.

INCENSE: Holy Smoke!

JESUITS: An order of priests known for their ability to found colleges with good basketball teams.

JONAH: The original "Jaws" story.

JUSTICE: When kids have kids of their own.

KYRIE ELIEISON: The only Greek words that most Catholics can recognize besides gyros and baklava.

MAGI: The most famous trio to attend a baby shower.

MANGER: 1. Where Mary gave birth to Jesus because Joseph wasn't covered by an HMO. 2. The Bible's way of showing us that holiday travel has always been rough.

PEW: A medieval torture device still found in Catholic Churches.

PROCESSION: The ceremonial formation at the beginning of Mass, consisting of altar servers, the celebrant, and late parishioners looking for seats.

RECESSIONAL: The ceremonial procession at the conclusion of Mass– led by parishioners trying to beat the crowd to the parking lot.

RELICS: People who have been going to Mass for so long, they actually know when to sit, kneel, and stand.

TEN COMMANDMENTS: The most important Top Ten list not given by David Letterman.

USHERS: The only people in the parish who don't know the seating capacity of a pew.

Afgans Love Dog Fights.


Luke Powell took a series of amazing photos on Afghanistan, but this one caught my attention:

Dog Fights are a popular sport in Afghanistan. Dogs fight to settle dominance, and once a dog knows that he cannot win, he yields, he rolls over, bareing his underside, and the match is over.

It may happen that occasionally an ear or a lip gets snagged in a dog fight and the match is a bit bloody, this is why the ears of the dogs are cut short when they are young, but dogs are rarely injured seriously in a supervised fight like this.

See the whole photo essay HERE.

AOL CD THRONE

Another great use for those AOL CDS tht seem to showup daily, the complete build can be seen right HERE.

Classic Olympic Moments




Wednesday, February 22, 2006

American Idol Twins Appear In Maxim


Jessie and Becky O'Donohue

Jessie's vitals: 5'10", 32B–24–34

Becky's vitals: 5'10", 32B–25–36

Proud to be an American: You first met Jessie and Becky when the stunning twins kicked off Maxim Fallacy Baseball in 2004. They went on to scarf down slop on Fear Factor before continuing their reality TV tour this year on American Idol. Jessie's musical mission got derailed by throat surgery, but Becky is still subjecting herself to weekly verbal teabaggings by snooty Simon Cowell.

Check out the whole photo shoot HERE.

Jesse McCartney at MOOD


Video of Mary Kate Olsen pulling up to bar MOOD in LA.

Video of Lindsay Lohan arriving and leaving MOOD in LA.

Video of Franki Muniz leaving MOOD in LA.

And what do all these Hollywood stars have in common?, hey they are all UNDER 21 and in a BAR DRINKING.....

Under California law, no one under 21 is permitted to enter the club, much less drink inside. But the Corona in Jesse's firm grip tells a very different story.

California's Department of Alcoholic Beverage Control (ABC) is charged with enforcing the State's underage drinking laws. ABC issued in the City of Los Angeles for 2005 -- 207 in total. Mood was never cited. Indeed, a record search revealed that Mood has never been cited since opening its doors. The ABC seems far more interested in busting mom and pop liquor stores, often using underage decoys in sting operations.

America , what a country.....

Our American Idol Pick 2006

Taylor Hicks....Rock on Dude...

A little internet research shows that American.Idolblog.com lists Taylor Hicks birth date as January 24, 1977. If this birth date is accurate, then Taylor Hicks just turned 29 and would have been within the allowable age range at the time of his initial audition.

Mr Hicks has a CD out in at least some stores. In fact, Taylor Hicks might be the most experienced contestant on the show this season. While Taylor Hicks official website offers little information on him, it does show that he has spent some time at the Playboy mansion.

Taylor Hicks’ home state is Birmingham, Alabama and WBHM reports that Taylor Hicks has entertained with the likes of James Brown, Tom Petty, Jackson Browne, Drive by Truckers, and Robert Randolph. According to the Birmingham Post-Herald, Taylor Hicks plays harmonica and has performed with Percy Sledge.

You can check out his Las Vegas Audition HERE.

His web presence can be felt HERE.

The Ketchup Effect

I think HIP HIP HORA! quite possibly could be the greatest film since CLERKS...

Written and directed by Swedish born Teresa Fabik in her feature debut, the film made a quick rise in the local box office in Sweden.

Teresa Fabik received the Kurt Linder scholarship 2003 for best feature debut by the Swedish Film Academy.

The film was given the Canal+ award at the Göteborg International Film Festival 2004.

The Ketchup Effect had its theatrical release in January 2004, and has already been seen by 315,000 Swedes. Original title is a play on words, meaning Hip Hip Whore.

Check out the film website HERE. or check out the teaser clip HERE.

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

I Miss Chris Farley...



Fertility Clinic at Kaiser

Ipoo?

Cuddle Clothing

Pantanlaine Classic Hug Jacket

* Current original face-to-face bestseller since 1959
* Thermal supercomfort lining
* Praised in writing by dozens of hug therapists - come see the letters on our "Wall of Fame"
* More affordable than many imitations

See the WHOLE Collection HERE.

Spray-on Birth Control

Spray-on birth controlAn Australian-based company called Acrux has partnered with New York-based Population Council, Inc. to create the world's first spray-on contraceptive.

Acrux manufactures a drug delivery device called "MDTS", which sprays a dose of medication to the forearm, which gets absorbed into blood system. Population Council makes contraceptives, including one called Nestorone.

The two companies will jointly market the Nestorone MDTS combo at reduced prices to public sector organisations providing human reproductive health products to disadvantaged people.

Now if only the two companies could partner with Avon to add some perfume, this stuff ought to really sell.