Sunday, March 31, 2013
Saturday, March 30, 2013
The Punchline
“After he dumped Cleopatra, there were rumors that Julius Caesar fathered an illegitimate child by a housemaid. But those rumors turned out to be false. It was actually Caesar’s cousin, Julius Schwarzenegger.” — Craig Ferguson
Friday, March 29, 2013
Thursday, March 28, 2013
The Punchline
The new pope “will be Pope Francis. Historically, the last Pope Francis was Frank Sinatra. Am I right about that?” — David Letterman
Wednesday, March 27, 2013
The Punchline
“When the cardinals are done selecting a new pope, smoke appears up the chimney. White smoke means a new pope. Black smoke means they have not reached a decision. Blue smoke means the cardinals are making ribs.” — David Letterman
Tuesday, March 26, 2013
Monday, March 25, 2013
Sunday, March 24, 2013
JLH thinks BIG
"I need, like, an insurance invitation. If somebody was like, 'Hey, you know what? We would like to insure your boobs for $2.5 million dollars,' I'd be like, 'Do it. Love it! Why not? These things right here are worth $5 million!"
Labels: jennifer love hewitt