Chuck Norris facts always amuse....

• Guns don't kill people. Chuck Norris kills People.
• There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
• Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
• The chief export of Chuck Norris is Pain.
• There is no chin under Chuck Norris' Beard. There is only another fist.
• Chuck Norris has two speeds. Walk, and Kill.
• The leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart Disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer
  
• Chuck Norris drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls.
• Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting.... CHUCK NORRIS GOES KILLING
• When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
• Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
• There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
• Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.
• Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
• Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
• Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
• Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
• There is no chin behind Chuck Norris beard. There is only another fist.
• Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
• Chuck Norris hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.
• Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.
• Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.
• Chuck Norris gave Mona Lisa that smile.
• Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
• Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost
• Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DeltaForce marathon on Satellite TV.
• Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.