Jessica Simpson's vocal range?

Jessica Simpson is a lot of things, but I never thought that in bed, she’s a regular Traci Lords.

Jessica and boyfriend John Mayer reportedly kept guests of the Hotel de Russie in Rome awake with all the noise she made while they were humping away in their room.

A source revealed to More magazine: “Jessica and John got back fairly early and stayed in all night. But by the sounds of it, they didn’t get to sleep for a long time.

“This woman was saying she couldn’t believe Jessica sounded like she was getting it on so loudly in the room next door.” [Source]

OK, I guess the hotel’s walls were that thin. I don’t believe for one second John is a sex god capable of turning Jessica’s volume dial all the way up. For all we know, it was John doing all that moaning and groaning and screaming, with Jessica in dominatrix garb whipping his maggoty ass to submission. Or something like that.